You May Never Know Unless You Try
by rowansmuse
Summary: New summary. After realizing his crush on Troy, Ryan goes through the process of getting over him... through helping him get back together with Gabi? And what happens when they meet once all grown up? Could it be love?
1. Chapter 1

A/n: Hey everyone. So this is my first try at something for HSM; hopefully well received and filled with slashy goodness. Set in HSM 2 and beyond... I'm hoping to trudge through and finish this fic quickly so I can get back my Hermione/Snape story that has given me such writers block. Please R&R... more than likely... the more reviews that are positive, the more I'll put in to this story. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything in this story- all right reserved by Disney/ABC Co.

Ryan Evans did not normally walk alone at night. But here he was walking the short trail near the neighborhood playground trying to collect his thoughts on the summer. After the spring and all of the cliques at school had all but disappeared Ryan had made so many new friends. In a last ditch effort to pursue star jock Troy Bolton, his twin sister had fixed it so he could get a job at their country club. Of course unbeknownst to Sharpay, that meant most of Ryan's new friends, those also of Troy Bolton, were going to be around the club that summer.

Pretty much his whole life had been about dancing; but this year it seemed to be all new because he had someone to hang out with besides his twin sister. He had gotten closer to some of the other kids from the spring musical, such as Troy's girlfriend Gabriella. Even now Ryan was being treated as one of the guys by some of the other jocks like Troy's best friend Chad. That was the other part that was new: one of the guys. Ryan had grown up with the curse of being more feminine than others. He was a bit sensitive emotionally, like when he cried in chick flicks, and also physically, like when he had some toes broken trying to play Little League as a youngster. Most boys stayed away from Ryan. They thought he was different. There was something weird about him. Ryan knew that all of that was true. It wasn't really apparent to him all of his life, but now at 17 he pretty much knew: he was gay.

Not only was he gay, but now he was crushing on the same guy as his sister, one Troy Bolton. One very straight Troy Bolton. _Of course I like Troy._ Ryan thought to himself. _Not only is he good looking and all of that but he is confident and tries to be understanding. He is good at everything from sports to singing. It's like he doesn't even try. He is the best with hardy any effort and people take notice of him. I wish I could be the way his is with other people. He's always laughing and talking to people... Me? I just hide in my sister's shadow. She speaks for both of us. Technically I don't think she would have it any other way._

Ryan kept marveling at what he thought would be his perfect first boyfriend as he came upon two figures on the playground. From a distance he could tell it was a boy and a girl and they were fighting. The boy took the girls in his arms and maybe even wiped away a tear on her cheek. She broke free from him and ran down the path. As she went under the streetlight Ryan saw her face. It was Gabi. Troy's girlfriend. Torn between maybe getting to console his crush after a big fight and helping an actual friend, Ryan hesitated and then followed the girl down the path, jogging a bit to to keep up with her.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

Ryan realized quickly he was not going to catch up with Gabriella so he raised up his hand and called to her, "Gabi! Hey! Wait up!" She stopped running and hunched over and cried out his name softly.  
"Ryan. I'm ok, really." She managed between sobs. He reached her and put his hands on her shoulders and faced her head on.  
"It's ok to cry. Come here," he said as he embraced his friend. "What happened?" Gabriella buried her head in Ryan's shoulder and took a large breath.  
"I don't know."

Ryan then place his hand on the back of her head to comfort her and replied, "yes, you do."  
She stepped back and looked at him, took a moment, and then began. "He's just been so different this summer. All he cares about is making money and impressing your family. He has no time for his friends. No time for me. I just told him I wasn't going to let him keep me missing him anymore. He had to make a decision about what is more important in his life. Basketball... or me."  
"And he chose basketball?"  
"No," she whispered and clung back to him, "He didn't choose anything. I just don't know him anymore. I couldn't stand there forever. I just said I had to do what was best for me. He can follow me if he wants. Or not. I have to do my own thing, right?" Gabriella sniffed and wiped her tears on her sleeve.  
"That's right. We all have ourselves to consider. I know I'm not an expert but if it's meant to be, I'm sure you guys will find your own way. The two separated and headed back down the path from where they came.  
"Thanks for listening, Ryan. You are a great friend."  
"No problem. Let me walk you home. You shouldn't be out in the dark by yourself."  
"I could use the company. I've been feeling so alone since Troy and I started fighting. Is there something wrong with me? That he doesn't want to see me?"  
"Oh, honey there is nothing wrong with you." As the two walked for a moment Ryan thought about what to say next. "Let's just say, this is the time in our life when we figure out who we are. Maybe Troy is just going through some growing of his own."  
"Growing apart from me, you mean."  
"Not necessarily. Maybe he doesn't need a girlfriend right now. Just like you don't need a boyfriend right now. Not to make yourself feel better anyway."

The two teens ended the block and turned the corner by Gabi's front yard. 'That is all great advice, Ryan. You sure sound like an expert. Are you seeing anyone?"  
"Oh, no," Ryan answered almost in shock.  
"I would think you would be beating away the girls. You are cute. Have awesome fashion sense. You are a great dancer. And you're obviously a good listener. Any girl would be lucky to have you."  
By this time the two were standing at The Montez's front door. Gabi threw her arms around his neck so quickly the two almost went off balance. Ryan put up his hand as she laid her lips on his and kissing him passionately. After a moment of realizing this kiss was not being reciprocated she opened her eyes and stepped back.  
"Gabi, I-"  
"What? I'm not good enough for you either?"  
"No I um... It's not that your... its just that you're...I mean I like..." he stumbled.  
"What? Blondes?"  
He shook his head. He figured he would have to tell someone someday and he figured this was as good a time as any. "No. Boys. I like boys. I think I'm gay."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

A/N: Thank so much to everyone who has added this story to their alerts and people who reviewed!

Gabriella looked Ryan over for just a moment before she reacted to the news she had just heard. "Well I guess that explains that. I'm sorry I didn't even mean to kiss you; I'm just so upset about Troy. I want him to get over this, thing, obsession, whatever. I just..."  
" Gabi, I get it. It's ok," he said cutting her off.  
" Can you forgive me? Can we still be friends?"  
Ryan laughed softly. "Of course we can stay friends. It was just a kiss. One which confirmed I should be past just thinking I'm gay."  
" Can I ask you about that? How did you know?"  
" How did you know you loved Troy?"  
"Just a feeling."  
" No different. It's just a feeling. It started with this guy at the country club last summer. I could tell he was flirting with me... that was the first time I had ever really noticed anyone like that. And it got me to think about why."  
" Have you ever... um... well never mind. That is an uncomfortable question. I've had enough uncomfortable today."  
" Ok. Goodnight, Gabi."  
" Hey, Ryan? Do you think you could talk to Troy for me? I think he is supposed to play golf with your family again tomorrow?"  
" Yeah. I'll do that."  
Gabi gave Ryan a last hug and whispered thanks into his ear.  
" And Gabi?"  
" Yeah?"  
" No, I've never."

All day Ryan had been thinking about what to say to Troy for Gabriella. On one hand, she was a close friend. On the other, he was also the biggest crush of his life. What was he going to do? He better figure it out quickly because he is already at the greens and he can see Tory walking towards him.  
" Hey," Troy said when they had reached eachother. "You are early too. Can we talk for a minute?"  
" Uh, yeah, sure." The two boys walked over and sat in Ryan's golfcart.  
" Ryan I don't know what to do. Gabi broke up with me last night. She said I'm turning into someone I'm not. Is that true? Just becasue I want to make money to fix my car to take HER out? And because I need a scholorship? I thought she would support me because she said she loved me. Maybe we don't know what love is."  
" That's two questions I think. First, have you changed? Yeah. I mean, I have hung out with Chad more than you this summer and you are supposed to be his best friend."  
" But a scholorship is huge!"  
" That's true Troy but so is having friends. That's what I learned this year when you guys joined the drama club. All I've had my whole life was my sister. And now that I have friends, I wouldn't trade them for the world."  
" I can see how having friends changed you. I used to think you were the same as Sharpay, ya know? Just out to get everyone instead of being nice to people."

This was the largest amount of words Troy had ever spoken to Ryan in probably his whole life. Too bad they were about getting his g_irlfriend_ back. There was no time for Ryan to even think about flirting with Troy. Or really even to make him take Gabi back. this was because Ryan had already resolved he was going to kiss Troy Bolton. Pretty much in front of everyone.

Troy didn't quite know what to make of his lips touching Ryan's for almost a full minute. It was almost like kissing Gabi. But not. Wait... was he actually considering this? He put his hand to Ryan's chest to lean him away. He looked in Ryan's eyes and he could see the boy had meant it. Troy was speechless. Gabi never looked at him like that. Ever. But he loved her. He knew it.

" How do you feel right now?" Ryan asked him.  
" Weird."  
" Well at least you know you aren't gay."  
" Thanks for that. I think. But I'd rather be kissing Gabriella."  
" Why?"  
" Because I love her."  
Ryan was hurting. He knew he would be rejected. He would at least try and do for Gabi then. He sighed and said, " Then fix it, playmaker."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

A/N: Thank so much to everyone who has added this story to their alerts and people who reviewed! I think I'll be putting up 2 more chapter before I decide if I'm planning on moving forward with this fic. Let me know.

Ryan woke up to the sound of his cell phone ringing and he noticed two things. The first was that he had actually been asleep before 11:47 and the second was the the call was coming from Troy. Ryan shook his head to make himself more awake before he answered his phone. "Hello?" he asked still half asleep.  
" Ryan? Are you asleep?"  
" Not anymore. What couldn't wait until tomorrow?"  
" I figured out how to fix things with Gabriella."  
" That's great. Can I go back to sleep now?"  
" I'm sorry. I just thought you would want to hear about it. Good night."  
" Wait..." Ryan said sitting up in bed. He rubbed his eyes and turned on his reading lamp. "Yes, I want to hear it."  
" Ok. I told Sharpay I'm quitting her show you know. So I figure instead of doing the talent thing I would just take her out. Like on a walk. Just lay it on the line. What do you think?"  
" You are just going to aplogize and hope that fixes everything?"  
" Well kinda."

Ryan threw his legs over the side of his bed and stood up. He pulled on a robe over himself and started over to his desk. It felt weird for Ryan trying to give advice about girls. Especially to Troy; No matter how he had acted over the summer, Ryan was somehow still crushing on him. He wanted to just tell Troy to forget about girls but of course, Troy was not going to listen to THAT advice.  
" You need to not just apologize but show her you care about her. That's the stereotypical flowers and candies bit."  
" Is that what will bring Gabi back?"  
" Well I think it needs to be more. She's special. Do something that would touch her heart. I know she loves singing with you. Why don't you sing to her?"  
" Sing?"  
" Yeah. I mean... you are good at it. You guys were amazing in the musical."  
" If you think that will make it up to her."  
" I would like it if someone sang to me," Ryan said without thinking.  
" OK. I will do it. Thanks. You have been such an awesome friend to me lately. I really appreicate it."  
" Hey, no problem," Ryan paused. "And sorry about kissing you today. I... I thought I could prove a point. Or something." Ryan could feel himself blushing.  
" I wanted to ask you about that. It felt really, well, real. Are you... um..."  
_Here goes nothing_, Ryan thought. "Yeah. I'm gay."  
" Wow. I guess I should have seen that coming. So if you kissed me, does that mean you are, like, into me?" Troy listened to the slience on the other end of the phone as Ryan fumbled for what he thought could be an acceptable answer. "You don't have to answer that if you don't want to. But you aren't ruining our friendship or anything. It was... well, nice. I feel complimented."

Ryan couldn't believe he was hearing those words. Troy was ok not only with him being gay but was over the whole kiss thing. If he couldn't have Troy. He supposed staying his friend was the next best thing. There are other guys out there, right?


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

A/N: There will be a huge jump in time after this chapter. **Besides **any detail that has changed due to what I've already written, this story is canon. All events that happen in HSM 3:senior year happen exactly as it should. Does anyone think I need to fill in with what happens during senior year or can I just move on to where the real story is going to take place which is when they all go to college? Please leave me comment if you feel either way!

Troy had been true to his word. The next night Gabi caught up with Ryan when everyone was shopping to let him know had things had worked out. Troy had apologized and told her how he felt. He even had taken Ryan's advice to try and serenade her.  
" You know Ryan, even though Troy and I are back together and totally excited to go back to East High, I know there is more out there. We only have a year until we graduate. What am I going to do then? Even though he blew off Sharpay he probably is still going to U of A. I'm dying to go to California. My mom and I have been talking about it since as long as I can remember."  
" Well, I don't know. You will have the phone I guess. And vacations."  
" I didn't even tell him yesterday. Should I have?"  
" I think he was just happy getting you back. Maybe that should be a talk for another time."  
" Maybe you are right. Thanks, Ryan. I'll talk to you later okay?"  
" Yeah. see ya."

Ryan watched as Gabi walked back over to the table in the food court where Troy and his friends were sitting. He could see how Troy's eyes lit up when he saw her and he grabbed her hand to get her to sit down next to him. Gabi put her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. What Ryan wouldn't give to do that with someone. To have someone look at him like Troy and Gabriella look at each other. To have someone give him that kind of affection. Gabi was his friend and he was promising to himself he wouldn't do anything to get between her and her boyfriend; that was the old Ryan. The one that let Sharpay push him around. But something inside him said he still wasn't over his crush on Troy Bolton. But she had exactly been right about one thing: there was still their senior year at East High as well as bigger and better things out there. After high school he would hopefully get into college, somewhere to do musical theater. His grades weren't always that great but hopefully his talent would still get him a scholarship. Maybe even into a premier school like Julliard. That was a much more attainable dream than dating Troy Bolton. He would meet some one someday who would be all of the things he was looking for. Things are always way better after high school, aren't they?

Sharpay saw Ryan sitting alone and went over to sit with him. She placed all of her shopping bags around her except for one which she put on to the table. She pulled out a skirt and a pair of knee high boots "Oh my gosh, wouldn't this be perfect for the first day of our senior year?" she gushed. Ryan still was watching the Wildcats sitting at the table near them and hadn't heard her. "Ryan! Pay attention to me!" His head snapped as he turned to face his twin.  
" I'm sorry. I was just distracted."  
Sharpay looked over at their classmates and shook her head. " I don't know how you can be friends with them. They royally messed up my-our-talent show."  
" Have you learned nothing this year, sis? Friends are what it is all about."  
" Looking fabulous and being a star is what is important! Where have you been this summer? I feel like I don't even know you right now. Why didn't you do anythig about it?"  
Ryan looked puzzled. "Do what about what?" he asked her.  
" Your crush on Kelsi Nielson. I see you staring at her. Evanses go after what they want, Ryan."  
Kelsi _was_ sitting next to Troy. Ryan almost laughed at how self absorbed Sharpay could be. She didn't even realize her brother's sexuality and they were twins! This was not the time and place for the conversation that would deny this odd rumor. Sharpay would definitely not be  
as understanding as his new friends, he knew that for sure.  
" Oh I don't really know. She really is nice. And she wrote good songs for us in the musical."  
"But she always writes her best songs for Troy and Gabriella. You should get us those songs! Ask her out, ask her to prom, I don't care. Get over yourself and get us those songs!"


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 5

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

It was a gorgeous late summer day and Ryan couldn't have been happier. Far away from Sharpay's influence he was living a life on his own; all of the things he had wanted for college life came true. He did end up getting into Julliard which is a dream in itself but he also kept making friends, becoming more confident of himself off stage and was happy. He even had met someone. A couple someones. That wasn't exactly what he had planned when he imagined blissful romance but Ryan was trying to be patient. For now it was a couple of dates a week and that was ok; this new guy was very nice and could potentially be something more. Ryan was thinking all of these thoughts as he walked down the street to grab the last of his weekly shopping. He was trying to get everything together for what he hoped could be the most important date of his life; tonight, Friday night, would be the night he would ask his newest beau back to his place after dinner. Lovely thing a trust fund; most other students still lived in the smelly dorms. At least that's what he thought, anyway.

Ryan rounded the corner from the shop with his two cloth bags of groceries when he was knocked clearly from his feet and to the ground. It was like a scene from a bad romantic comedy as he and the clumsy stranger grabbed for a rolling head of lettuce that both of their hands landed on at exactly the same time. Both recoiled and heads snapped up and the man looked right into Ryans eyes. He brushed his sandy brown hair out of his own, Ryan noticed he crinckled his nose while doing it, and flashed him a perfect smile. Ryan was in the shock of his life; Stooping there across from him on a dirty street in New York City was Troy Bolton.  
" I was hoping to run into you here, man. But not literally," Troy said laughing. He grabbed the lettuce as Ryan picked up his recovered bags. Troy handed him the head with a quick sorry.  
" What are you doing here?" Ryan couldn't believe his rotten luck. No matter how he had tried he could not forget Troy. he had tried all through senior year and it hadn't worked. Even when Ryan has his first real boyfriend he had been quick to compare to him to his crush. Not that it mattered. He was meeting Gabe in a few short hours and they would be taking another step in their relationship. Troy in New York or not.  
" Long story or short story?"  
" Short story will do. How have you been? Is this like vacation?"  
" I've been better actually. Broke my wrist last season and I'll probably never play basketball in college again. Gabi left me for a Stanford Guy. Chad is getting married! To Taylor. He is moving so she can keep attending Yale."  
" But that doesn't answer why you are here."  
" I was looking for a change of scenery I guess. Everything is different. Even my parents don't sleep in the same bed anymore if You kow what I mean. So I took this opportunity to do something else. I got into AMDA."  
" Really?" Ryan asked sarcastically. "You? You know that stands for American Music and Dramatics Academy right?" So Troy moves to the big city, he thought. He's lonely and probably a little lost like I was when I first got here. He wants me to help him out, like I did back in high school; then he will never call me or write me again. " Yeah I know that. I'm not just some dumb jock. I went to Berkley for two reasons and only one of them was Basketball."  
" And the other reason was Gabriella."  
" Ok, three reasons then. The world as I knew it went crazy, so I did something a little crazy too. I did two shows last year and it was the most fun I ever had. I think I really love acting. So I'm here. I'm so glad I saw you today. I haven't seen anyone I know for days and it's lonely as heck." Troy pulled Ryan in for a hug, and even though he thought better of it, Ryan hugged him back. He could feel Troy rubbing his shoulder and squeezing him tighter before letting go. "It's really good to see you, man. Would you want to maybe get back together later? I was trying to get to the bank down the street before it closed, but I really want to catch up with you."  
" I can't actually," Ryan answered. "I have a date. " What he wanted to say but didn't had been, I have a date that I won't let you walking back into my life or the way you hugged me ruin it. His face said it all to Troy and he felt embarrassed. He figured Ryan would have been just as happy to see him. He was lonely, especially since he didn't have anyone to call home to. He scratched the back of his head nervously and Ryan caught on. Troy was being sincere about being friends again. He thought Troy had just forgotten about him. Not like Gabriella who wrote him every week. He knew that Gabi and Troy weren't together anymore. She said he had gone a bit distant and told her he wasn't sure about dating anymore. She wasn't going through a big break up again so she just started going out with some other guy. _That's what we do when people don't feel the same way for us as we do them Troy. We move on. _Ryan felt bad for being a bit hostile to Troy, so he pulled together his courage and said, " It's not too serious, I should be in kind of early. Are you staying in a hotel? You could just crash at my place and save the money."  
" Are you sure? I don't want to put you out. Classes don't start for almost a week and I..."  
" No, Troy. It's good. This can be a lonely city without friends." Ryan grabbed his receipt from his bag and the pencil from behind his ear. He hit the brim of his hat up on accident but still went to write his address on the back. "Do you think you can find it? It's only a couple of stops on the subway."  
" Yeah I probably could. I've been using the walking GPS on my phone since I got here. Without it I would have been sleeping outside and starving," he laughed. Ryan's demeanor had since softened and he chanced at another joke.  
" Yeah it can be like that," Ryan chuckled. "I will see you around 11? I can give you my spare key and you can let yourself in."  
" Thanks. I appreciate it. I'll see ya." Troy accepted the key into his hand and put it in the front pocket of his jeans. He looked up at Ryan and fixed his hat. Ryan just smiled at him as he turned and walked the other direction. _Oh God I'm doing it again,_ he thought. _I'm crushing._


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Troy's story.

A/N: sorry if anyone read the version I had up yesterday witht he two typos in it... I was rushing to get it done before I had to leave for work. Enjoy and please review!

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

Coming to New York was absolutely frightening. Troy's dad used to be leary of him walking around alone in California? There were more people on one block here than at his entire college. He was seriously so happy to have seen someone he knew that day; especially that it was Ryan. He had been a good friend to him when Gabi had broken up with him before. He had amazing advice and seemed to be really dedicated to his friends. Troy could really use someone like that right about now. He wanted to start a totally new life and this was his chance. Being the basketball guy wasn't as fun as it was cracked up to be. Everyone wants you to do for things for them; like win the game or get them into the cool parties. There wasn't any room for people like that in his new life; he only wanted people to want him around because they wanted him as himself. The only person in his life who had been that way was Gabriella and now she was gone. But here he was, in New York freakin' City and he was going to make the best of it. Yes, he of course missed Gabi; she was his first steady girlfriend. He had even thought he loved her when they were younger. All things eventually change and for him things changed in a way he never expected: he fell out of love. At first he didn't want to admit and he tried to act like nothing had changed. Gabi wasn't stupid and she caught on right away but he had never really expected to fool her. At the time he had only been trying to fool his heart. She was all he had ever known when it came to love and it killed him he didn't feel the same anymore. His best friend was even moving into serious relationship territory by proposing to Taylor while he and Gabriella were splitting up. The sinking feeling evens seeped into his dreams where he had vivd visions of himself with other people and that made the lonliness even worse. Which was why when he was told he couldn't play basketball anymore he applied to a school as far away as he could from her. New York seemed like the city of dreams for so many of his East High friends he figured it could maybe make a miracle for him too. Troy's father was not a fan, at all, of Troy wanting to act but after the basketball fall fiasco his father pretty much stopped communicating with everyone in his family. Troy's mom moved in with her sister and he in turn packed for NYC.

As scared as he was, Troy was also excited. He was attending a new school, one that was very prestigious. It gave him a chance to pursue the only thing he still loved, acting. After all of that had gone down he made and sent an audition tape to AMDA. He had gone to the school over the summer to meet with staff and was accepted. He had boarded a train with just a couple of suitcases ready to start a new chapter of his life. After wandering around the city aimlessly for a couple of days he made his first friend. Or remade anyway. His heart actually lept at the thought, he just chalked it up to finally seeing some one he recognized, even though he had a quick thought it could be more. Troy was outside of Ryan's apartment fingering the key in his pocket. He felt strange just walking into somone's place, especially after not seeing them for a year. He went inside himself to get at his courage, found some, and put the key in the lock. He opened the door, picked up his stuff and walked in. He carefully placed his suitcases by the door and shrugged off his coat. He looked around the room an the apartment looked unoccupied. It seemed like a nice place but nothing in compared to the Evans's Estate. He could see around the corner was a yellow kitchenette and small leather loveseat. Also a leather futon along the other wall and down the way he could see two shut doors which Troy supposed was the bathroom and Ryan's bedroom. He really wasn't sure what to do so he sat down on the futon and waited. It wasn't long before he heard footsteps inside the apartment. _Ryan must already be home,_ he thought. But who opened the bedroom door was not who he expected it to be. A tall guy with longish brown hair came storming out the room clad only in briefs and carrying the rest of his clothes. Ryan was in exaclty the same state of undress when he followed the other boy out of the room. Obviously neither of them noticed Troy was there for a moment becasue the continuted to argue all of the way to the front door.  
" God dammit! It's just a condom! What's wrong with you?" Ryan bellowed.  
The other boy opened the door walked intot he hallway and shouted, "You must not trust me if you need one! Fuck off!" and started walking away whille awkwardly trying to hold his shirt and put on his pants. Ryan slammed the door and sat down with his back against it. He put his head in his hands and started mumbling to himself.

Troy had no clue what to say in this situation; Ryan's "not too serious" date had gone a bit farther than Troy had anticipated. What do you say to your friend when his boyfriend leaves him alone in his boxers? Troy has not alway been the most eloquent and he knew it. But this comment really took the cake. "Hey." All he said was hey? W_hat an idiot_, he said to himself. Ryan's head snapped up and his cheeks turned beet red.  
" I really didn't know you were here. Man this is embarrassing," Ryan replied as he leaned his head back touching the door. _What an idiot._


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

A/N: Yay we are finally getting somewhere! Please let me know if the story is going ok... I don't have a beta so I'm going blind on what makes sense when I get all wordy-like. Anyone out there interested?

Warning: From here on out this story will earn an "M" rating. I mentioned in the first chapter there will be slash- so if that isn't your deal I would suggest not reading on. Hopefully you would have gathered that by now but just in case, I guess.

I do not own HSM, Disney/ABC does.

Ryan wanted to die right there at the entrance to his living room after absolutely being mortifed in front of two attractive men. First his date had not gone as planned at all. Gabe showed up to to pick Ryan up, but instead of going out to dinner he burst into Ryan's apartment with his lips on his and pushed him straight to the bedroom. Both boys were obviously on the same page at taking their relationship a step further even Ryan had planned on being more subtle about it. Of course, he didn't mind Gabe moving forward on his own at all. He found it arousing when a man took charge. By the time the two of them were down to their underwear he forgot that he was going to have a guest showing up that night. When he had Gabe's cock in his mouth he forgot about Troy Bolton existing at all. When Troy walked into the apartment Gabe had just about sealed the deal; he had his hands on Ryan's hips, ready to enter when Ryan reached to his side table drawer. He pulled out the offending condom and Gabe about had an heart attack and pushed Ryan away. He started crying and ranting at the same time while trying to pull on his clothes. Ryan couldn't quite understand what was even going on by the time Gabe was already halfway out the door thus quickly ending their relationship. And after all of that he had Troy Bolton, who now his erection quite remembered, had witnessed what could have been called the most embarrassing moment of his life. he threw his head back against the door hoping it would knock him unconscious. He opened his eyes and he was staring into the most beautiful ones he had ever seen, Troy's.

"Are you okay?"  
"Not really. I'm not sure is more broken, my heart or my pride."  
Helping Ryan up by the hand Troy replied, " At least it's not your head that's broken."  
Ryan couldn't help but smile at his friend's cheesy joke. When he got to his feet he realized he was still quite without the proper clothing to receive guests. He left Troy standing there for a moment, returning a few moments later with pants and a botte of wine. "Do you want a drink? I sure as hell need one." Both boys went in to the kitchen where Ryan pulled out two glasses and filled both generously. "I guess I should consider this bottle a parting gift from Gabe. I doubt I'm going to be able to patch this one up."

Troy again was not quite sure what to say. Ryan had been the one good at giving him relationship advice, not the other way around. On top of that he was kind of in shock from watching the fallout of Ryan's evening. Troy shouldn't have been surprised that Ryan had been with another man. He had quite plainly told him once he was gay and today he had said he was going on a date. Maybe if he hadn't had so much of his own running through his mind he would have put those two things together. But he had not. Hearing someone was gay and seeing it was an altogether different experience for him. The few gay people he knew at his old school mainly kept everything behind locked doors where Troy never had known. This. Well, this was different. He wasn't quite freaking out like he had expected. Most straight guys would not be too comfortable in this situation but Troy thought he was being pretty cool. He didn't really see anything wrong with it. Love was love, right? Ryan was his friend, one who had opened his home up to him. He had to think of something to say and quick. Ryan was now staring at him and waving his hand in front of his eyes. Troy shook his head and said the first thing that came to mind. "You look good without your shirt on."

Ryan had to laugh only because he was a bit dumbfounded. Troy realized his horrible comment and tried to correct it by saying, " I mean. I don't know why you couldn't fix it. You are a great guy. Good listener. Attractive..."  
"Thanks, Troy. I get what you are trying to say. But you've never had anyone reject you like that, I'm sure."  
"I can think of one instance. Gabi ran from me once. Back in that summer. We fixed that. For a while."  
"I guess that's true. This wasn't like you and Gabi though. You were in love."  
"Yeah we were. But now she's moved on to something better. And maybe I have too. I'm excited to start my life here."

Both boys were silent for a time and Ryan was already filling a second glass. Troy was never much a drinker so he just sipped on the bitter drink.  
"Sorry to bring her up, Troy. Are you okay with it?"  
"Yeah, you know, I am. It's my fault it's all over anyway. Things just started feeling weird for me. I love Gabi, I really do. But as time went on it just didn't feel right."  
"What do you mean by didn't feel right?"  
"Think about it like this. When someone kisses you passionately you should be able to feel the same way, right? I just didn't anymore."  
"Do you mean you didn't love her anymore?"  
"More than that. I mean, I don't know... It just didn't feel right. I can't explain it any better than that. How about you? Are you going to be okay? Did you love that guy?"  
Ryan motioned towards the couch and Ryan grabbed the wine bottle while they both went and sat down. "No. Not really. I wasn't lying when I said it wasn't serious. That's the first time we ever, you know. Are you uncomfortable with me talking about this?"  
"No. Why would I be?"  
"'Cuz you are straight," Ryan tried to laugh.  
"I may not have a lot of experience with the whole gay thing, but I get it. Love is important no matter who it is."  
"Troy, I think I'm touched," Ryan mocked. Now that he was having a third glass of wine, everything was quite comical no matter how dismal the night had started. Troy had just poured the last of it into his glass and took a drink. He shoved Ryan's arm and answered, "Now you have been."  
Ryan could feel his smile melting slowly from his face. Troy saw tears forming. This was something he did have experience with. How many times had he taken Gabi to a party and she got so piss drunk he had to carry her back to his dorm in tears? Every time.  
"Ryan, it's okay," he said.  
"Not really," Ryan choked out with a quiet sob.  
"No, I mean it's okay to cry. Breaks ups are hard." Troy put his arm around his friend and pulled him close. "It's cool. You were there for me when I needed you in High School. I'm here for you now." Troy placed Ryan's head on his shoulder. Oddly, something finally felt right.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

a/n: Wow guys, I can't believe it's been two weeks since I've been able to update it all. I share computer and someone installed something that cause me to have to reformat my hard drive but now it's all okay. I swear I'm not the just leave this story, I'm going to finish it. Enjoy and please review!

The next morning Troy woke up early. It was not usually an early riser but had a problem sleeping. Ryan on the other hand, who had had a bit too much to drink, was still snoozing away when Troy rolled off the couch. He went into the kitchen and saw that Ryan had left a box of cereal, bowl, and a spoon on on the counter for him. He poured listening to each piece fall and ring in the bowl. While he was taking care of Ryan the night before, Troy really had not had a lot of time to think about what he was feeling. But now all he got was silence and breakfast and was able to compute the events from the night before. Was Ryan right, the most straight guys would not be comfortable? Maybe that's true but Troy sure was. It was actually nice to have someone to care about again. Did that make him just a good friend or was he secretly wanting more? Did straight guys even ask themselves that? Everyone must question their sexualty at some time, right? He had thought this line of thought would clear thhings up, not blur them further. He would just have to find out what this was about Ryan.

After Troy finished eating, he realized the Ryan had also left him a note. The gist of it was really "thanks for taking care of me while I was drunken and weepy" in a very heartfelt way. Troy couldn't help giving a small smile, the one that usually had been reserved for Gabriella. He put his hand up to his mouth because it was such an odd thing for him to do and wondered how Ryan can make him smile that way. It seemed to him that his life in New York was definitely going to be an adventure.

***  
Ryan woke up with the biggest hangover of his life. He'd never intended on drinking that much, especially because he had a guest. Besides that, Troy was still special to him. He even thought to himself now that Gabe is gone, not that there is much of a chance of this, he could pursue some sort of relationship with Troy. He was sick of being alone. You sick of being trampled on by people like Gabe and his sister. Trade been receptive enough for his lifestyle. The night before he asked all kinds of questions which meant one of two things. For one Troy could just be trying to understand his friend. But on the other hand maybe he was questioning himself. He said some things with Gabriella felt wrong, maybe it was because he just didn't like girls. Things change; people change. Maybe this is the development the finally was going to go the right way for Ryan Evans.

Ryan got up and changed his clothes. He sat down in front of his vanity and fixed his hair all pulling down his eyes trying to eliminate any redness from sleep. He never made an appearance in public even in his own house without proper primping. When Ryan liked what he saw the open door of his bedroom and walked out. It was quite a shock to him to see the Troy and never put on regular clothing but was sitting on his couch and just a pair of lounge pants and nothing else. The sight actually made the boy's hands turn clammy.

"Good morning, Troy," Ryan said. Troy's head snapped as he turned to look at his friend. Troy stood up to greet his friend.  
"Hey, good morning. Are you feeling okay?"  
"Yeah, I would be feeling much better if I didn't have this hangover though."  
"You did hit that one bottle pretty hard," Troy said laughing. "Did you sleep okay?"  
"As much as can be expected I suppose. How about you? Oh my couch isn't really that comfortable for sleeping. At that a few times myself."  
"It was okay. I just miss my bed at home. I pretty much miss everything home. Was it like this when you first moved out here? I mean, I'm glad that we met up, but I still feel kind of lonely."  
"I was like this for a while," Ryan said as he sat next to Troy who had also just taken a seat. "But it will get better. It did for me. When school started I met people, I got involved, you build your own little world out here. But I do have to admit, I'm glad that you now are in mine."  
"You know me too. Even if we didn't always hang out a lot I didn't like you Ryan. You are cool guy." Troy instinctively put his arm around Ryan for just a moment. This feels good, he said to himself. After realizing what he just thought it because arm up off of Ryan and later on the back of the couch instead. Ryan noticed his hesitation and slumped his shoulders a little. He didn't want to seem sad but it did make him a little. Troy could see the Ryan didn't want him to put his arm around him. And for the first time Troy was uncomfortable with his friend. Trade jumped up from his seat went over to his suitcase and grab some clothing.  
"Hey, you know I've got some things to do on campus. Do you have plans? Would you want to walk me?"  
"Umm. Yeah. Okay." Ryan wasn't sure he really wanted to go with Troy. Even if it meant nothing to Troy, the arm had meant rejection to him and he wasn't sure he could take any more rejection this week. Ryan, always the martyr, still got up from the couch to follow Troy out the door once he had sloppily pulled on a sweater and some jeans. "Hold on," Ryan said after locking his door. He pulled on Troy's sweater so this it hung correctly instead of being off of one shoulder. "I'm not going out with anyone looking like that," he said with a smile. Even if things were bothering him, Ryan sure knew how to put on a good front.  
"Yeah," Troy said jokingly. After thinking quickly about his decision from earlier in the moring he thought he would just throw something out there, to see if Ryan would take the bait, "You wouldn't want someone to think I was your boyfriend or something."  
Ryan was terribly hot for a moment and for once was dumbstruck. He almost had answered him subconsciously saying, of course I would; but after thinking better of his he only replied with something more safe. "No, not looking like that."


End file.
